Wednesday, February 1, 2012

The Dating Game, episode 5 - "Watch What You Say to the Angry Nerd"

So I met a woman on the internet, and after a few days of conversation, we decided to meet and go out to dinner. She was younger than me, very nice, very attractive, and we hit it off right away. There was a great chemistry, both physically and intellectually. The dinner and the company were both as enjoyable as I could possibly hope for.

   As I was driving her home form the restaurant, the good vibes continued.  We kept up our wide-ranging conversation on a variety of topics, and enjoyed how much of a connection that helped to develop between us, even though we certainly didn't see eye to eye on every topic. It seemed like after going through some rather "interesting" (in not so good ways) dates, I had finally found myself a potential keeper: attractive, smart, feisty, and funny; it seemed that she felt the same about me. On the way, she asked if I would like to keep the evening going by joining her in her apartment, an invitation which took me about 1.2 seconds to accept. It just keeps getting better! An air of anticipation filled the car, and we both seemed to be floating on air.

"I really am enjoying myself, for the first time in a long while."
"I'm having a great time too. You really have been a welcome change from some of my other dates."
"I know what you mean," she said, laughing. "I really like you."
"Thank you, I like you too."
She smiled and gave me a look that said you're about to find out how much I like you...

But then she  said it: "You're different from most men."


The Angry Nerd can be a pretty easy going fellow for the most part, but he does have a few pet peeves. First and foremost among them is people cavalierly throwing around numbers and/or mathematical terminology when they have no way to support of back up the claims they are associating with said numbers or terms. And as a lover of all things mathematical, I can't prevent myself from becoming annoyed as hell whenever someone - even someone as attractive in every other way as my date - casually says something like "You're different from most men", no matter how hard I try. See, she thought she was paying a compliment to someone she really liked. The only thing I could take from those well-intended words, however, was that she was disrespecting the use of the word "most". I mean really, what "most" is she referring to? Most men in the world? In the United States? In Maryland? In Baltimore?

I paused and took a deep breath.
Just say thanks, let it go. Just say thanks, let it go. Just say thanks, let it go...
I tried...I really did...

"How would you know what 'most men' are like?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, you said I'm not like 'most men'; how would you know what most men are like? There's an awful lot of men in this world."
"Obviously, I'm not talking about all the men in the world. What is wrong with you? Why are you jumping on me about this? You really want to take a compliment and try to pick it apart? I mean, DAMN."

Let it go, let it go, let it go, let it go, the little voice in my head kept saying. But, alas, I could not...

It probably wouldn't surprise you to find out that by the time I had finished lecturing her on the mathematical meaning of the word "most" - and my feelings about mis-use of mathematical terminology in general - that my invitation to come up to her apartment had been rescinded. You probably also won't be surprised to learn I never saw her again after that night.

I guess I told her...


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